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  • ชื่อรัฐบาล: Al-Tariq Gumbs
  • ลงทะเบียนหมายเลข: 05674-078
  • อายุ:37
  • เวลาเสิร์ฟ:13+ ปี
  • ทาวน์โฮม:นวร์ก, นิวเจอร์ซีย์
  • ประโยค:168 เดือน
  • ค่าปัจจุบัน:Racketeering (ยั), การกบฏ
  • นามแฝง:King Sankofa (Formerly known as Killer Reek)
  • วันที่ออกข่าว:2022
  • สังกัดเรือนจำ:เลือด (ปีก)
  • วงกลมของอิทธิพล:Emmanuel โจนส์, Alford เลสเตอร์, ออสติน omar, บัตเลอร์ Tewhan
  • สถาบัน:FCI Memphis
  • I would like to show you the real me.

Mental Prison

mental-prison

ขณะนี้, I can’t say when this started to happen, but for some reason my mind started to tell itself that I didn’t deserve to be happy, that I didn’t deserve to be treated like the man I was. Something in my mind told me that no one loved me. Something in my mind told me that my family hated me. Something told me that my lil brothers and sistas didn’t love me. Something told me that people in my life be running game on me. Something told me that prison is where I need to spend my life because I deserve to be here. Something told me that these guys in here are my peoples. Something told me that the streets of Newark hate me like never before. Something told me that my life was nothing like the lady Sheila Hopkins told me when I was 19 ปี. Something told me that my son is going to have the same pain as me, and he doesn’t truly love me. Something told me that my mother didn’t love me the way she said she did. Something told me that to be happy is to be a fool, and as I looked around I started to see that my life was really turning up side down.

I was told by Blondie that it may be because of the one year anniversary of the last time I saw Natalie and she passed away. I started to think about that. I started to think about both of my brothers dying this time of the year. I started to see things I never saw before. I started looking at these walls and started to see that this was the reason for my anger and pain. I have been locked up for 14 years straight, no chaser, and it has taken a toll on me that I didn’t foresee, or maybe just didn’t want to see. Something in my head tells me I’m still that 25 year old dude who got locked up 14 ปีที่ผ่านมา. ผมนั่งดูทีวีและเห็นทั้งหมดของคนเหล่านี้และหญิงเดินทางออกจากคุกและฉันยิ้ม. ฉันมีความสุขที่และพวกขอให้ฉันฉันจะมีอะไรที่มาจากบางส่วนของกฎหมายเหล่านี้. ผมแค่บอกว่าไม่มี. พวกเขาไม่เข้าใจว่าฉันไม่ให้ขึ้น. ฉันเพิ่งเข้าใจความเป็นจริงของสิ่งที่พระเจ้าได้วางแผนสำหรับฉัน. ชีวิตของผมก็ยังไม่ได้ปฏิบัติตาม.

ในหัวของฉันบอกตัวเองฉันพร้อมสำหรับถนนเหล่านั้น แต่พระเจ้าจะต้องไม่คิดอย่างนั้นเพราะเขาได้รับการแต่งตั้งให้ผมที่จะทำในเวลานี้. That’s cool because I always felt that this needed to happen. In order for my life to move forward I must shed myself of my past. อย่างไรก็ตาม, I can’t sit here and say that I’m not affected by the time I have done so far. Some guys do things to keep their mind off these cold walls. I’m like that. I float through this madness and try not to let it rub off on me. I heard somewhere that when a person does more than ten years in prison they should automatically go and see someone because that is not natural. I understand what they mean. My mind was tripping the last couple of weeks. I couldn’t write, couldn’t think straight. I couldn’t keep my word to the people I love. I was running around looking to get into fights like I was 22 or something. I caught my first shot (write up) since being in the feds. I knew something was going on. I couldn’t place my finger on it but it’s these walls, and I made the first mistake. I allowed them to enter my mind. I allowed these cold walls, with not a touch of love, to get into my system. I became destructive in my thinking and actions. Lies flowed off my tongue. Anger came out of my pores. As I sit in front of this computer, I’m going to tell you that if you are ever are going through something and you can’t figure out why you have a destructive mind set, I think you should take a step back and look at your life and pull yourself together.

My life in prison has been so crazy, and I have been pushing past it as if it doesn’t bother me. That’s like not eating and trying to work out. It’s not going to go well. We have to find something or someone to bring us out of that mindset. In prison there’s so much anger and hatred that when people lie in your face you expect it. When people say they’re your homie and then turn around and talk behind your back you expect it. It’s funny that all the guys in here want to get out, but guys out there are doing things to get in here. If that isn’t madness, I don’t know what is.

To my peoples on them streets who are in that mental prison, my advice is to find your key. Blondie you’re going to be okay. It’s time to do what is needed because living unhappy isn’t the way to live. I love you and hope that one day those dreams become reality. To my crazy sista Dell, it’s going to be okay. You are truly one of kind and your friendship is something I cherish. Your pain will turn into happiness. My crazy publicist and friend Unique thanks for running for me. I know I got you tired. LOL. Camisha, my crazy sista, รักคุณและรู้ว่าคุณอย่างแท้จริง sista ใหญ่. ด้วย, Ms.Miranda, เพื่อนของฉัน, ฉันต้องการให้คุณรู้ว่าคุณจะไปได้ไม่เป็นไร. คุณต้องไปหาสิ่งที่ทำให้คุณมีความสุข; ชีวิตสั้นเกินไป. Jazzie คุณมีสิ่งที่มีชีวิตอยู่และไม่เคยคิดว่าเขาจะให้สิ่งที่คุณไม่สามารถจัดการ. ค้นหาที่สำคัญของคุณ, แต่. ให้กับทุกคนที่รักของฉัน, พบที่สำคัญของคุณและปล่อยให้ตัวเองออกมาจากคุกจิตของคุณ. และเพื่อให้พี่ชายและ sistas หลังกำแพงเหล่านี้, ที่สำคัญของคุณเป็นความคิดของคุณ. Never give them that. Even if Obama doesn’t help you, you should help yourself by staying alive and healthy and educating yourself. This may be prison, but it doesn’t have to be your home. ค้นหาที่สำคัญของคุณ . . .

King Sankofa out!

Free more and then Free some more after that . . . Don’t stop until all who are worthy of that freedom get it. The problem is keeping it . . . Peace my people . . . I play a part in my freedom. I now know that. I’m out. King Sankofa . . .

P.S. I’m working on getting all of my books in order and making them available. It has been a long ride, but I’m getting it together. Thank you all for being patient with me, and yes all of my family and friends are crazy. They know I mean nothing by it, but they have to be crazy to be friends with me. ฮ่า ๆ

R.I.P My big brother Bruce “Bobba-Lee” Gumbs. (I think that is how he spelled his nick name.) My lil brother Zeus, after 15 years in this hell hole, I’m praying and hoping you have it together. Love you, but don’t want to talk to you right now. คำ.

  

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